Before 1/1/15, I had never seen more than 5 minutes of Friends.
I never watched Primetime TV, my main exposure was the 4pm-6pm syndicated
block. Friends aired directly opposite Seinfeld and The Simpsons, and my
loyalties were steadfast. Now that it's on Netflix, I'm fixing that, and loving
every minute of it! Below are my hastily scribbled notes from every single
episode (bar one I guess I really had nothing to say), just slightly edited for
coherence.
Also, for some reason, I'm keeping a Friends Power Ranking
going- I'll do that before the notes. The > means "greater than",
and if there are more than one, that means a larger gap.
After the first couple episodes:
Phoebe>Joey>Monica>Ross>Chandler>Rachel
Halfway through the season:
Phoebe>Monica>Joey>Ross>Rachel>Chandler
End of Season 1:
Phoebe>>Monica>Joey>Rachel>Chandler>>Ross
The One Where Monica Gets a Roommate (Pilot)
These assholes just
sit at this coffee shop all day?
Everybody looks like
really weird alien versions of themselves
Whoa, so that's how
Ross and Rachel meet
Mello Yello
These are some
outfits. Speed Racer
The One With The Sonogram At The End
Okay, the opening is
a million times more bearable when it has actual parts from the show and not
just the scary umbrellas and dancing
Ross is a museum
man?
"this is the
Three's Company where there's a misunderstanding"
-"Oh I've seen
it" *turns off*
Our little harMonica
- THE GREAT ELLIOT GOULD
The One With The Thumb
Friends gettin' grim
Chandler is a jerk
and smoking and it's gross
I like Chandler and
Joey being friends (hhaahahah)
Monica's dating a
college professor?!
Ewww, he's smoking
at work…. Where his cubicle has its own no smoking sign…
Holy crap, this is
that episode that How I Met Your Mother stole
I really like when
they watch TV and make fun of it, like in Beavis and Butthead
The One With George Stephanopoulos
Who the fuck is
George Stephenopolis.
It's less than 100
steps from Chandler/Joey's place to Central Perk
I think this is the
first time they broke along gender lines
Couldn't happen
today with the protective netting!!!
George Snuffleupagus
"I thought you
were great in Silence of the Lambs"
Did not actually
feature George Stephanopoulos
The One with the East African Laundry Detergent
Another cold open
with more battle of the sexes
"I don't know
if it's me or his hunger strike"
Lmao, Chandler has
Rocky and Bulwinkle socks now, oh my god. Mix and match?!
UBERWEISS
Rachel's never done
laundry
The One With the Butt
Monica is a control
freak
"You finally
made your crack in, gonna invite us to the big opening?"
Chandler has a
"It's a Wonderful Life" poster in his bedroom
"I got the
part, I'm gonna be Joey Tribbiani's ass!"
The One with the Blackout
Phoebe Boo-feh??
Lmao joey with a
menorah.
Ugly naked guy needs
a spinoff, I wonder if they ever see him. Maybe it's Brad Pitt.
(Wildest places ever
had sex)
Monica: a pool table
I think
Joey: Library
women's room
Phoebe: Milwaukee
Ross: It's a small
world after all
Rachel: Foot of the
bed
Uh oh Joey just said
"the Friend Zone"
And he knows about
Ross wanting Rachel
"I can't tell
you, because of… the reason!"
Monica had a crush
on Joey??!?!?!
Bob Buttons the cat
Larry Hankin as
"the weird man"
The One Where Nana Dies Twice
Chandler's reaction
to "he's a he?" and his little dance was some A+ physical comedy
"you have a
quality"
"This almost
never happens!"
They're making fun
of the idea of homosexual hair
Aw. Phoebe's mom
died :(
Phoebe is the best
Young Elliot Gould
looks like old Damian Lewis
Ross is in peak
physical comedy
The One Where Underdog Gets Away
Blossom joke
Chandler hates
Thanksgiving because his parents divorced
Joey is just eating
marshmallows
Give Courtney Cox
the Emmy
"Ugly Naked
Guy's taking his turkey out of the oven"
"What did you
wish for?
-The bigger
half"
Chandler saved
Thanksgiving!!!!
Lmao at the gag
ripping off the ads underneath Joey's STD. Hemorrhoids, etc, ending in Winner
of 3 Tony Awards.
The One with the Monkey
He just straight up
has a monkey out the gate.
Now Phoebe's mom's
suicide, oh geeeez.
Oh no, Fun Bobby
isn't Fun, his dad died.
The One With Mrs. Bing
Monica just killed a
guy.
This explains a lot
about Chandler that his mom is a sexpot.
"I'm a fabulous
mom, I bought my son his first condoms"
The foreign
boyfriend storyline is SO FUCKING copied in HIMYM.
Joey: "I'll
just pee in the street"
I love this extended
riff on the raquetball.
"you don't have
to be awake to be my man"
The One With a Dozen Lasagnas
Friends it's too
early for you to be self-aware of being a great sitcom.
Too cold Joey.
And it was Odd
Couple.
"I'm excited
about being an aunt
--OR an
Uncle…."
Joey owns
WHY IS MONICA
WEARING JEAN OVERALLS
The anti-Paolo. The
age of Ross.
The One With the Boobies
How can I not click
next episode?!?!?
Chandler has
intimacy issues… "when the laughter stops,".
Joey's dad owns
"I married a
lesbian to make YOU look good"
Rodg has a chain
wallet.
Awww dammit, the
dating a psychiatrist storyline happened in HIMYM too.
Joey's good
storyline with his parents was nice.
Funny closer with
the circle of revenge.
The One With the Candy Hearts
Happy Valentine's
Day
Written by Bill
Lawrence
Janice is back!!!
Oh geez, Chandler is
bankrupting Joey :(
"A picture of
this guy naked
-- he's wearing a
sweater
No, he's not."
Oh geez, Ross is
hitting rock bottom
The One With the Stoned Guy
Holy shit Chandler
quit his job when he was offered a promotion
It's me
The I don't have a
dream speech.
Oh geez I don't want
to hear Ross talk dirty.
I'm laughing so hard
at the Ross+Joey dirty talk with Chandler walking in.
He's being tempted
to come back to the dark side!!!
Jon Lovitz walked in
and everyone cheered wildly, what alternate universe are we living in
"Steve blazed
up a doobie"
"Tartlets."
"I'm looking at
the Weenis and I'm not happy!"
Special Appearance
by Jon Lovitz, wheeeee.
The One With Two Parts!!!
NEW INTRO AHHHHHHH
this is disorienting
"My monkey is
out of control"
Weenis jokes still
goin strong
"Urkel in
Spanish is still Urkel"
Now Helen Hunt just
walked in and everyone started cheering? I think it's Helen Hunt?
What, George Clooney
and the ER guy?!
Eliot Gould is back,
FUCK YEAH.
I really like when
Rachel and Monica do impersonations of each other.
The One With all the Poker
They're being mean
to Joey for crying
Uh oh, time for a
battle of the sexes.
Aunt Iris is crazy
and awesome.
I like that they
play for keeps.
Joeincidence.
Rachel keeps string
betting.
Uggghhhh Ross threw
it.
The One Where the Monkey Gets Away
The One with the Evil Orthodontist
Ugly naked guy got
gravity boots.
The One With the Fake Monica
Let's just say my
curious george doll is no longer curious.
"Joey makes me
feel like I'm this big" - Joey, same.
Aw the see no evil,
hear no evil, speak no evil pose.
"How do you get
popes in a volkwagon,
- make them take off
their hats."
"Do you know
there is already a Joseph Stalin?"
Phoebe's playing a
game boy!!!!
Sorry Friends, good
riddance to the monkey.
The One With the Ick Factor
Chandler getting
dogpiled is awesome.
Pheobe/Chandler one
true pairing.
"I just had sex
with someone who wasn't alive for the bicentennial"
"You shouldn't
even be here, it's a school night"
The One with the Birth
Phoebe-songs!!!
I'm not buying the
sentimentality of this mostly since Ross sucks, also didn't care about the
monkey.
WHOA THE PREGNANT
LADY was Leah Remini from King of Queens
The One Where Rachel Finds Out
Season Finale!!!
"Making money
hand over fist!!" Oh Phoebe
Yes, Ross is going
to China.
Their hair has
gotten under control .
"how can she do
that, when she's never shown any interest in you?!"
Oh my gosh Joey got
Rachel "Oh the places you'll go!" for her birthday.
"I don't think
any of our lives are going to be the same again"
Aaaaaaaaaauuuuuuuuuugggggggggggghhhhhhhhhh
Rachel is rushing to meet him at the airport.
Joey has a Scarface
poster.
"It was like a
ticker tape parade"
Jennifer Aniston is
wearing an ass cape around a skirt?!
NOW THEY'RE BACK AT
THE AIRPORT
What are the chances
that same couple is on the same flight back?
CLIFFHANGER
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